Cyclical

Life goes in cycles...our mood goes in cycles...nature goes in cycles...everything pretty much goes in cycles. Picture a circle (Or check out the diagram I made)...In every circle, there will be a high point (climax), a low point (ditch), and points that lead to both the climax and the ditch. Momentum is what keeps us going, so that we don't get stuck in one space...but what happens when the momentum weakens? We find ourselves either stuck in one spot, or rolling back and forth, between the two in-betweens of the circle, not getting enough power to push through and make full circle.

This is what I call being in a ditch. You may have another name for it; like "plateu" or something. It is where you end up when you are having trouble in a certain area in life, and are having a hard time making decisions related to that struggle within you...so the universe holds you there until you learn the lesson. The lesson learning is our momentum. We continually learn new things, and those new pieces of knowledge and wisdom are what push us to the next level in whatever part of a cycle we are in. Once we reach the climax, we can be sure to expect a new teaching to be brought into our awareness, and to have to repeat the cycle all over again, if we desire to make another full circle... I know that I desire to go full circle in every lesson which is brought into my life. I am grateful to have already made maybe tens of thousands of full circles already in this lifetime, but I know that there are more to come. We are always in a cycle. We never stop. We can get really slow, or we can get crazy fast, but the cyclic nature of all that is will never cease. Here, we can either find fear, or we can choose to find comfort. Most of us fall into fear more often than not, myself included. It is a part of what makes us human. What is amazing is that we can become aware of our tendencies such as the tendency to fear or to reside in anxiety, and through the simple act of watching and shifting our thoughts, we can breathe there, and make the uncomfortable more comfortable in doing so.

I've been battling anxiety after anxiety moreso than usual in these past few weeks. Burried insecurities and thoughts have found their way to the surface...not to annoy me, but to be alleviated...healed...let go of. I just now realized this...as I am writing (I have so much gratitude for the gift of expression through writing). These particular entities do not want to be burried inside of me anymore. I don't want them burried inside of me anymore. They no longer serve me or those who are near and dear to me. They've done their duty and have taught me the lessons that I needed to learn from them...so now the work is in letting go, so that I can make another full circle,completing yet one more small cycle within the larger cycle of a larger cycle of a larger cycle... and continue on.

I hope that this helps you, as much as it helps me writing it... love <3
Namaste 

Live a Colorful Life

This was supposed to be a facebook status, but I started typing, and realized this would be better written as a blog. . .
:)

"You never know when you're gonna go...of course, we hope we have a full day, at least!" - SL

Living life to the fullest, each and every day, guarantees that when we do go, we will have left this world with love. - me

"Sometimes I feel like people are too serious. Life is too short to always be serious; if I am gonna have one last day on Earth, I am gonna want to just play and have fun!" BjG

I started this day, going outside of my comfort zone by wearing a bombin' funky outfit. I wanted to see what it felt like to literally wear my personality. I felt colorful, so I chose to be colorful. I felt different, so I felt like looking different. Today I chose to live, act, be, dress....the way that I wanted, without worrying about what anyone else would think, say, do. The theme of dress followed me to my yoga matt, where the atmosphere was playful and goofy...annnnd sweaty (of course). The music made it even better. God (or the Universe if that's what you want to call God), brought me a day of play, because I asked for that with where I focused my attention and with what my intention would be. 

What I learned today is that it is of great importance to be here, in the "now" moment...to be light hearted...to have fun...to be there for others...to express gratitude to one another and to thank God for giving us this moment...this breath...this heart beat...
It is so good for us to simply be present and to not let past let-downs, mistakes, or regrets interfere with our "now". Our "now" is new...it is always new. We can always wipe our slate clean and start all over again, no matter what. No one can tell us that we can't...only we can do that.(I can't take full credit for everything I write here, because I receive much of my wisdom from my wiser friends.) I am so grateful that I can share with and learn from the people in my life. I have so many dear ones that have done more than they know, just by being listeners, advice givers, and mainly just by being present in my "now". 

The two quotes above are from today, and from two very wise and wonderful women at two different times...but read them together, and there you have it...one really great piece of advice from two very beautiful souls.

<3 Namaste 

Meow...

Do you ever feel like you have so many things going on in your life at once, that you feel like you could go absolutely insane in a matter of moments? I feel like a cat; literally...I have 9 lives...er maybe more. I have my school, my job, my yoga, my meditation, my blogging, my zeal business, my journal writing, my pet/house/child sitting services, my clean for trade at the studio, keeping up my living (and car) space (it's really hard to keep this place in order...always fighting entropy!) (hey that's ten! I bet there are more things...but I'll stop there). . . . . 

Life. gets. crazy. There's no stopping this madness. Whenever things get chaotic, it seems to be more and more difficult to pull inward and stay centered, focused, motivated...and easier to become discouraged, tired, lost...but lucky for me, a few of the "lives" I mentioned above are things that bring the balance back into my life...because like the cat with nine lives, I choose to land on all fours in as lightly of a manner as possible. I may feel like I am walking a very thin and wobbly rope at times, but I know that if I pull in, yeah, even if it means losing a few hours of study time and such, then I'll be healthier and in a much better state of mind that I would be if I didn't have such activities. I also enjoy commuting the town on my beloved bike (MoonLight - the Scorpion Queen). She saves me a lot of time and gas $$ (because we all know about the gas price hike. I don't want any of that). Biking also contributes to a steady flow in my life. Biking, yoga, journaling, blogging, etc...they all get me into this zone that takes me away from my anxieties and settles me back into myself...calms me down and gives me some peace. I find myself retreating to these "mini vacations" time and time again. Instead of becoming addicted to drugs, alcohol, food, people, etc...I choose to devote myself to healthy flow. It doesn't mean that every now and then I fail and come up short. I acknowledge my humanness. We all mess things up sometimes, but the key is to be resilient and forgiving of ourselves. The pain of messing up comes from the inability to move on, to be in the present moment. This moment has nothing to do with last moment or the moment ahead. This moment now, we can choose to be happy...even if only for a moment; no matter what's going on in our outer world...we can still have peace and calm inside.

I am blessed to be a part of a community that helps me grow into myself and blossom into the flower that I am. I enjoy our small chit-chats in the most uncomfortable postures, and yet I also enjoy our mutual silence. I enjoy our laugh attacks in 3,5,7,10 minute timings of Sirsasana (headstand). I enjoy being a part of a whole which gathers for the same reason, where the people all around me are doing all the same things that I am doing...where I know that I'm not the only one with my kinds of struggles. I'm not the black sheep in the room...but rather, we're all black sheep in one room...together....My teacher quoted Rinpoche today: "You are perfect just as you are...but you could use some work". This embodies so much truth. I must learn to accept myself as I am, but I must also allow myself to expand for as long as I shall live. We don't need all the answers to all of our questions in order to be happy. The answers are really in our questions. We ask people for advice, and they tell us what we already know deep inside...but sometimes we are too afraid to trust our own insight and intuition, and rely only on the insights of others... but when we learn to trust ourselves...our own instincts...life begins to unfold, and a whole new world of opportunity and beauty arises. 

For me, my yoga practice isn't about getting a goal pose and going "ok, check! I'm done". It's so much more to me than that. It's about eternal blossoming...eternal expansion...eternal learning...eternal practice of patience, love, gratitude....it is a practice that embraces me in my successes and in my failures...it is always there...whether I am on my matt or at my desk, or in my kitchen, or at my job.....the practice is infinite...

That is all for now. Love<3